DDay 10-11: Tougher than I though

Dissapointment. I gave in.

Afternoon of Day 10, I gave in to my friend's cooking. Probably, I got curious on how that Ukranian pancake would taste like. :( I had 1.5 pancakes, a quinoa beetroot salad with pine nuts and goat cheese, 4spoonfuls of rice and lentils. It was yummmy..

When i reach the bfs place.. braai.. Had a tiny piece of roasted potato and a chicken leg.  I also ate Combos :/

Come next day, deviated again. Breakfast was good. Then went for movies, and had my own small tub of caramel popcorn, munched on combos, all through the afternoon and night (but didnt finish the small pack), had a cup of the quinoa salad, shared a pint of Ben and Jerry's with the bf..

Junk of a weekend.. argh..

Dissapointment.. :'( and Ive got only myself to blame.

DDay 9:: Feeling good..

Because its the weekend! hahaha.. I have a fully packed weekend, starting tonight. Its not all fun though, mostly errands.. with saturday spending time with the beau.

Or could it be Im close to the Zone border?? tee heeeee

Or most probably because I got good sleep. I slept around 11pm yest.

Im travelling next week, 1-2 Sept in AUH and 4-9 in EU. I will not have that much time to clean, cook, pack.. its crazy.

For my 4-9 sept trip. I plan to cook my meals on the 2nd & 3rd evening  (2 meals per day as breakfast I can take from the places Im staying at, they will have eggs or I can buy yogurt :D.) . I can sleep on the flight.

Its best effort time ppl!!!!! I need to lose as much as I can by end of Sept!!!

If the food gets spoiled on the later part of the trip, at least I tried and been on the program for most part of my trip.. If all are preserved, then lucky me! Get to save a lot of euros too.. heheheh..

I didnt have my crackers today, Im glad though, coz I got to consume them in the evening, while Im cooking. At least I have something to eat after 9pm when hunger striked. I just had to condition my mind during the day when I felt hungry. I had my fruits with me.

All meals taken on time today. Vitamins, crackers, fruits were within allowance. 2DCs

DDay 9: DV free

DDAy 8: Emotions and Eating

Do not underestimate the power of this phrase.

Gained 1.2kg!! wtf? Did I have too much DCs yesterday? I think I had more than a liter!?!? Did my lack of sleep do this? :'(

I will not weigh myself again until I have to. Im feeling sad right now.. and surprisingly.. missing the bf.. well much.. jeez.. I just saw him on Sunday... errrmmm.. so unfamiliar territory.

Tried not to be cranky.. not easy. but after coffee.. everything was bright again! #coffeelover hahahaha

I have my food for today stocked in the office, but still cooked my breakfast for today and tomorrow plus 1 meal. Im keeping this having 2 days worth of meals available all the time.

I gave away the last Provita pack I had at home. I really cant handle that. I end up eating more than what Im allowed, and once I start, its difficult to stop. I need to stock up on ryvitas.

Come midday, i had a huge argument with one of my best friends. Took a lot out of me. I was so bummed in the evening that I had a strong urge to just chuck this diet and eat something nice, something tasty. Anything! Went for a beer with a colleague at a nearby Irish pub.. well she had beer and I had a DC :D and after an hour I wanted to eat soooooo badly! It took a good 30 mins of saying "yah order.." "nooooo I cant eat" literally. How annoying is that? Im glad my colleague didnt punch me in the face..

It was extremely difficult. The internal struggle, reasoning with yourself whether or not to give in. The reasons to give in are very powerful, despite  sounding silly enough in my head. I almost did give in.

My success (for today) depended on just 1 word,1 thought, 1 phrase, 1 decision - NO. THANK YOU.

I will not give in. Sounds easy right? Think again..

Reached home before 9, shaking with hunger and anticipation. Had my last serving of crackers with a teaspoon of light mayo and ate my cauli rice with minced beef.

And everything was alright...

All meals taken on time, fruits, vitamins and crackers too. 2 DCs.

DDay 8:DV free.

DDay 7: The Ugly Truth

Back at 71kgs.. 

I just heard my heart break a bit right there.

I weighed myself today for the Spring Challenge on the forum. It hurts to update my ticker.. From 63kgs back to 71kgs. Im looking at the silver lining here, at least I was not back to 76.9kgs! thats a good 10 lbs off right here..  :(

Target goal was 57kgs.. which I still think is dangerously low, I'd probably be skin and bones by then. And that is a whopping 14kgs away! 14 fucking kilos!! whew. I am more than glad to lose just 10kgs.

I want this 10kg gone by end of September. But this would mean a lot of sacrificing. I may really have to pack food on my 6 day trip to Munich- Vienna - Zurich.

I have to do this.

Woke up with determination and prepared all my meals for today and tomorrow!! :D I seriously wont let myself end like I did yesterday. But I miscalculated the time that I didnt have enough to cook my breakfast. I thought, I can get yogurt from the only grocery in our office building, a low fat one at that. And it was just my luck that there is only 1 left of the plain low fat yogurt..

Whew...

I went to swimming class today. Cant say I wasnt hungry by the end of it :D  And being prepared with a meal paid off today. I got an impromptu invite for a ladies night! I was just so glad that I had my dinner with me, ate it before meeting the girls, and had 2 diet coke's the whole evening..

Reached home by 12:30 though.. so amount of sleep im sure is compromised.

DDay 7: DV free.

DDay 6: Too Busy.. Is there such a thing?

Back to work.

Slept late last night, so I woke up late as well. I just had a yogurt and fruit for breakfast then cooked and packed my lunch..

I must admit, this diet really works. In a span of 5-6 days, the bloat on my face and tummy has somehow diminished.. It just really works. It makes you think:

why dont you just follow it??

Is it not worth it??

Why do you have to give in to the junk, which you already know does nothing good for you but instant gratification??

Was that instant gratification worth it??

Anyhoo, our office is still up to its abundant self. I came in this morning, went to the pantry for my usual black coffee and there it was-- a huge arrangement of arabic sweets from a colleague available to everyone for the taking, no reason.. no occassion.

Glad that I dont eat arabic sweets. Hmmmm...

I didnt cook my dinner for today as I woke up so late this morning. And by evening, I got so caught up with errands + the dentist visit that it was already 9pm and I havent eaten my dinner. I was so so so hungry to the point of dizzy.

I tried to wait it out, but was kind of impossible to reach home by 9:30. I already had a yogurt for breakfast, so that was not an option. Fruit and crackers allowances are consumed.

By 09:30, I caved. I ate the crackers, half a pack of it to be exact.

When I reached home by 10:30, I searched the forum about skipping meals. I really didnt feel like eating dinner. I just wanted to sleep. All the post about it had a big message of DO NOT SKIP MEALS! Hmm.. I was full from the crackers and I wanted to sleep. So I went to the kitchen and started measuring.

But I stopped. I was not hungry. Why do I have to eat when Im not hungry?

I know that was not so Coheny- Zonious move that I just made, but fact is, Im not hungry. So I kept what I have measured for the next day and went to bed by 12 after winding down in front of the telly.

Brekkie and lunch taken on time, vitamins, fruits and crackers too. 1 DC

Note to self: "ALWAYS have your meals with you. ALWAYS."

DDay 6: NOT DV free.

DDay 5: Still Hungry

I took an off from work today. Feels good not to be working on a working day :p

Woke up early and spent 3 hours in the garden just soaking up some morning sun and light breeze..

Had my omelette breakfast but it didnt suffice. I felt hungry 1 hour later.. even with the multivitamin..

Im out of crackers..

All I can think about were McDonalds pepper chicken wings..

Went for groceries for more stuff..5 days on the plan.. couldnt break this now. I wanted to pass on the Provitas because from experience, it starts the deviation for me. As much as I wanted to avoid it, i was so hungry and was that close to deviating. I was at the supermarket for chrissakes!! Fruit allowance was over by lunch and my only salvation until i can have my dinner are those damn crackers!! Gave in to provitas.. had 2 pcs within allowance. Im glad to have the rest of my cracker allowance later on the day.

Also had a massage today.. long overdue.. then went to a friends place to finalize our trip 's itinerary.

All in all, its one of those days when you just have to move with the motions.. it could have been better..

All meals take on time, fruits and vitamins too. 2 DCs

DDay 5: DV free.

DDay 1-4: ENOOOOUGHHH!!

Ugh!! Im sick of having to repeat day 1 over and over again, its embarrasing! I really hate this.. and I have so many excuses.. World Cup, Iftars, birthdays, going away parties, dates(!), I will start tomorrow.. its endless!

Needless to say, I feel like I have regained everything that I lost. I am scared to step on that scale. For now I am just thinking of getting back to routine. Whatever I weigh at the end of the month, if I do this right, couldnt be so bad, and I will be happy with it.

One day at a time...

Lets roll...

DDay 1 (20th Aug): Looking Good

This day started like any other day. I started it with the intention of being CD clean.

Had yogurt and peach for breakfast. Done.

Day went by until lunch. Ate my chicken with veggie lunch..

Afternoon went by without difficulty. I was like, hey.. i can do this.. let me shop for groceries later..

I wanted to keep the feeling.. and follow through..

I had a plan to meet my friends after work tomorrow and head straight to my "bf" 's house for the weekend (oh yes.. i do have 1 now.. so odd how it happened) 

And there is no way for me to follow through but to prepare 4 days worth of meals.. pack up.. freeze them and just carry it with me and to hell what they would say..

and i did just that. I cooked meals(even breakfast) for 4 days!

Dinner was cauli garlic fried rice with minced beef.. YUMMY!

All meals CD clean, taken on time. Vitamins and cracker allowance too..1 DC

DDay 1: DV free.

Dear God help me!

DDay 2: Ready

This was how I felt this day - Ready. Ready to take on the CD.. ready to take on the weekend... ready and cant wait to be healthy and drop the weight I've gained back..

It was a normal day in the office. Normal hustle and bustle..

There was a birthday celebration in the office. 2 huge honey cakes. I didnt have any.

Met my friends at 8pm for a mani pedi.. had my dinner once they finished with my hands :D after the session, i drove straight to the middleof the desert to join le bf and ze boys for some braai.

Yes, braai.

Surprisingly with all the meat and biltongs... i did not cave in. Just had my last fruit allowance for the day.

Placed my food for the next 3 days in his fridge. Crackers on standby.

Yes, Im ready.

All meals taken on time. 1 vitamin, 1 DC, all crackers within allowance.

DDay 2: DV free.

DDay 3: Stronger than I thought

Woke up around 830 and went outside where we had the braai.. and i love the change of scenery! Trees.. grass.. capt jack the dog.. fresh air.. a bit humid.. but its alright.. 

Made myself a cuppa black.. took my sunnies.. sat on those chairs.. and chilled talking with the boys..

Btw the bf and friends live in the same compound. And they despise veggies! They call it goat food. :D so they made fun of my egg omelette with finely chopped cabbage, mushrooms, onion and tomato.. they looked at me as if im a weirdo. In my head, go make fun of me all you want.. I dont care.. lets see who will have the last laugh! 

By 930, it become quite hot to sit outside so went back in, showered, watched tv and napped.

Went for movies today.. i thought i was only going to be faced by the popcorn temptation.. but hell no..

We watched Hercules AND Lucy. While watching Hercules.. the bf had 1 caramel popcorn and 1 orange and grape slush..and I had 1 DC. The smell of popcorn... daym!!

I ate my lunch during the movie.

Before watching Lucy, he bought another slush AND NUTELLA CREPE. Holy crepe!!! I almost caved!!! Wtf!!!! He knows im doing this, so he is not going to let me have it and of course I cant make him not eat what he wants in front of me as this is my choice.. but mannnnnnnnn..... almost caved..

after 2 movies.. i was triumphant!

We reached home. His flatmate was home. Kept munching on Godiva chocolates.. kept offering me too.. I kept saying "No. Thank you." REPEATEDLY. Oh.. do not underestimate the power of this phrase.

I am certainly craving by evening. For ice cream!! Bf kept saying "No. You will not."

Flatmate saying.. "you passed the junk test in the cinema..do not fail."

Gritted my teeth and ate my dinner. 1 hr later.. ate my last fruit for the day.

All meals taken on time. All within allowance. 2 DCs. No vitamins though.

DDay 3: DV free.

DDay 4: Bring on the Hunger

Day started fine. Woke up by 7 as I slept by 9pm! Cant remember when was the last time I slept so early and had straight sleep. 

Bfs work starts early at 6..so he was out and I spent the morni g sitting in the garden sipping my black cuppa... and capt jack kept me company.. sweet dog.. it was windy today so I stayed there until 930.. had breakfast there. I chatted with the flatmate's gf who was in Tanzania.. i was feeling bored :/

Bf kept popping by though.. once at 8, then 9. He had to do extra work til 10..a new drone came so he  had to check it out.

Today was a chilled out day. Just watched tv.. napped.. since i wasnt doing much.. i felt hungry quickly. I had 1 fruit and 2 crackers before 12noon! My food rationing today was not good. I know i will be rrally hungry by dinner...

i was craving big time! For anything! I am so close to caving in. Flatmate prepared cheese, capers on top of salted crackers! Huwaaahhhhh! I wanted to have even that!! 

But I didnt. Just chugged my DC.

Had my lunch exactly at the 5hr mark. It was tasty btw. I seasoned my tilapia fillet with dried rosemary,thyme, bit of salt, and lotsa pepper.. Stir fried it with boiled cabbage, baby asparagus, mushrooms, green pepper, garlic and tomatoes.. topped it of with an almost ripe mango (1 cheek) YUMMY!!!!!

Watched rugby with the bf. Im starting to enjoy this game :D napped afterwards.. then he had to work again from 4-8.

Was getting antsy. There is a bottle of nutella in the fridge..

by 6, i finished my cracker allowance. All i have left was my dinner

The flatmate came home with his shawarma and curly fries!!! My lord!!! Huhuhuhu i so want those curly fries. I opened another DC.

Had dinner at 8.

All meals taken on time. No multivitamins. Fruits and crackers within allowance. 2 DCs

DDay 4: DV free.