Day 1: Not ideal

My first day didnt start the way I planned it. I wanted to wake up early at 5:30 and take a packed breakfast so I can join my bf for a walk (whie he works) at 6:15.

Routine will have it, I got up at 6 and rushed to get dressed into my joggers and sneaks, didnt weigh (!), didnt measure and didnt make breakfast!

Reached there and walked for about an hour and started my day with coffee. We had to pass by the grocery to get some supplies and reached home at 10. Had my breakfast at 10:30.. late!

Napped in the afternoon and woke up at 4:30 (!!) and had a late lunch. Which means I had dinner at 10 just to keep the 5hour window. So theres my deviation. :'( Food wise Im on track and ate less than my fruit allowance.

I sent a message to my consultant about this. Which is more important, maintaining the 5 hour gap between meals or having your last meal at 9pm. Lets see what she says. (Update 31Jul: the 5hr gap rules. Just dont sleep right away. At least after 2 hours)

Weighing in and measuring tomorrow and will have breakfast at 8! Thats the plan!!

Day 1: not DF

Day 0: Scared Shit

Same as my entry in June, Im scared asf to fail for the 100th time! During my previous [failed] attempts, I tried my best to plan on how to avoid deviations and eventually spiraling out of control. Whats so different now?

My confidence and determination are shaken but my persistency is still there....

I started working in a new organization 2 weeks ago and today is a full day induction for new joiners. I wanted to start the plan today but as part of the induction, lunch at the cultural center was included. I didn't want to deal with the questions of not eating, so decided ahead that I will just let it be. I had a CD  breakfast and dinner today though (based on old plan).

I was invited for ladies night with old colleagues, its actually a full night of bar hopping. I didn't go, had to drop a friend to the airport.

Oh, and again I start my journey with my TOM! phew..

Tomorrow is the start of the weekend for me, and I've come up with stuff to keep me busy. Lets see if these will help:

- start sanding those old kitchen chairs I want to recycle
- take my cat to the vet
- look for materials for the re-upholstery of the kitchen chairs
- pay bills and get groceries
- clean house

Here we go...

New Plan.. Another Chance

I purchased another plan to eliminate all reasons why I am not able to keep up with the program for 1 or 2 days.

The logical person in me tells me that its just me, its my problem and that I am very weak with temptations, but the hopeful side of me thinks that maybe my plan is not working for me anymore.

Money spent.. new blood test + new plan.

I received my plan quickly from the online site, it came in just 2 days! The plan is totally different:

1) Cracker allowance is more
2) Fruit allowance is more
3) Target weight is 1kg lower (58kg iso 59kg)!-- I asked my consultant about this.. Wilma, and she said my old target was 2 years ago, and I was younger 2 years ago! :'( what a way to break a heart eh?
4) Got a fish option for meal 1, which I like because I can only eat eggs or yogurt so much that I really wanted another option.. Im not really a cheese person.
5) Meat and vegetable allocations are all different.

My start date is on Friday, 29 July 2016. Hopefully I can keep this up.

My starting weight: 77.7kg--> Im trying to bring this down to 77 or 76.something.

I will do the same measurements like the last time, although this time I don't have access to that In-line body fat measuring thing.

Will blog here then maybe after a week of being on the plan, I will brave to write on my diary in the forum and update my ticker too!

If I do this right and deviation free, Im hoping Im done with reefed by end of November.

Lets do this!!!

Turning Point

I hope this time it is..

I'm at 80kgs +/-.

I tried and failed so many times that I'm actually scared to write here as I don't want another documented failure.

I got here again. I can enumerate influences as to how I reached 80kgs but at the end of it, I only have myself to blame.

Accountability.

Ive been complacent. Life happened.  I travelled quite a lot, been with my bf, worked a lot of late hours, ashamed to go back to the gym, office department is abundant of temptations and I gave in to almost every single one of them...

I just gave in by not delaying gratification.

I plan to start tomorrow, but I'm not as confident as I was the first time.

Here we go...

Week 2: Here we go

	Day 8	Day 9	Day 10	Day 11	Day 12	Day 13	Day 14
Deviation	free
Fruits	-1
Crackers	w/in allow
Multivitamins	0
Diet Soda	1
Feeling?	ok; normal
Temptation	none
Weight	-

Day 8: I talk a lot

Lots and lots of talk.  Im getting tired of it.

 

Ok, my week 1 wasnt so promising, so instead of beating myself up over it, Im just going to consider it as warming up.

 

I had woken up this morning with the intention of still doing this. I've read on the forum today something that I needed. I was just pondering why is it difficult for me to stick through. Eventhough I say life has gotten in the way, somehow, my mind cannot accept and labels this as an excuse. And here I go find my answer:

When we're interested in doing something we only do it when it's convenient to do so. When we're committed we won't accept excuses, only results. 

"What a disgrace to grow old without ever seeing the beauty and strength of which your body is capable".

I really have to want this. Like really, really accept the fact that there is no easy way to this. like really. no easy way. I keep looking at it as "if i lose this 12kgs, i would be able to fit into that dress by my birthday" or "how much better it is to shop for clothes" or anything else superficial

when i started, i had something else in my mind, which somehow has taken the back burner. i dont know why, maybe i got overwhelmed with it. that its too much to think about so i keep focusing on getting through the day, which i also think is not a bad way too, but i think this one is much better used when its really really tough - ie, during plateau's, or when you are down to your last 2kgs before refeed..

i started this, with:

Reduce
Rebuild
Maintain

I should remind myself of this. This has what pulled me through before. The thought of being able to [re] build the body that I want to maintain. Whew!

Its time to re-read. Rinse and repeat

Reduce to Gain - No to Skinny Fat!

Day 8 -- > Done!