ADay 5-8: Struggling

OMG.. Im struggling really hard with the detox.. the chocolate detox.. :(

Im stuck around 67-68kgs

on ADay5-7, I am good during the day and terrible in the evening. I usually end up eating chocolates alone! Well, I had Sumo delivered again on ADay5, and KFC on ADay6 and ADay 7, I had eaten a pumpkin risotto which was yum, and had a Chi-Chi drink which was wow and whew! :D

What I realized about this struggle is that it was caused by the feeling of deprivation. Its not a mind blowing discovery but more of a realistic one. "Oh.. I have to eat this <enter junk name> as much as I want now because tomorrow I will start the strict regime again", which in turn builds on the addiction and therefore making the detox process tougher. AND I can eat A LOT of chocolates until I feel sick..

Despite the realization, I still am struggling with my Day1 for 2wks. There were days when I am Cohen clean, only to break down on the next day.

ADay 7 was a clean day, but the amount of control I had to exert in the evening.. OMG..I was really itching to call for chocolates.. I mean I was really really craving that I felt that I was suffering.. Talk about withdrawal symptoms.. Which carried on ADay 8.

ADay 8 was full on chocolate cravings.. You cannot imagine! and by 6pm, I gave in. Plus I didnt have dinner packed that day and forgot that it was the Germany vs Portugal match which I watched with colleagues at a pub. So I ended up eating outside, having a normal coke (no diet or zero DC available) :(

Im not giving up though.. I will still keep on trying.. I know its a mind over matter thing.. and nobody can help me do this but myself.. I just need to pull my shit together..

Busy at work as hell..

Day 20: Detox??

Could I be detoxing so late in the program? Ive noticed for the past 2 days, that I am hungry, sleepy and somehow lightheaded in the afternoon.. Even just after an hour of my meal, I feel my stomach is hungry. I can get past through it but this has never happened before.. It could be when Im having a seafood day? I had seafood for today and yesterday. Could this be it?

I wore my skinny jeans today!! whooohooo.. still hurt a bit in the tummy an tight.. but yes wearable... I think its time to buy a skinnier pair of jeans to look forward to into wearing :D

Meals today:

BF: eggs+finely chopped mushroom, cabbage, tomato, onions+2crispbreads

S: coffee

L: BokChoy stir fried in onion, garlic and ginger +cubed tilapia fillets stir fried in finely chopped mushrooms, onion, and garlic

S: 1 crispbread

S: 2 crispbreads

D: BokChoy stir fried in onion, garlic and ginger +cubed tilapia fillets stir fried in finely chopped mushrooms, onion, and garlic +green apple

S: green apple



Program wise, we celebrated my birthday as planned, and I stuck to my meals and still deviation free today! I will have my beef meals tomorrow.. Maybe

The only thing that is not right, is that I havent worked out in more than a week! I am too busy! Not even a single session of yoga, and I miss it. I think I may go on Saturday or Sunday.

^_^