All in His Perfect Time

Its easter today and I decided to go to church given that  Christians were allowed to take the half day off.  After mass, I planned to go to the beach. I dont remember when was the last time I went to church, let alone to confession. But today was something different.

I really wanted to go to mass. I thought maybe Im just excited about the fact that I am going to spend some beach time, but no. I really did want to go. I left earlier than what was allowed as I want to find parking soon enough. I parked on the opposite side of the church so I dont risk getting stuck in traffic and being late for the service. This meant I have to walk a bit with all my stuff, even my meals, its too hot to leave it inside the car, it might get spoiled.

I reached the church, sat in peace in quiet. How lovely it is to be inside and feel this peace. The church was full but not overflowing. I made it on time and I felt happy.
 

The service started, by the time they sang "Christ have Mercy", I was almost in tears. Why havent I been going to Church???? I have been so enormously blessed my entire life and I couldnt even go to offer heartfelt praise and thanks?!

I think this is the first time in my life that I actually felt what going to mass is all about. I did not feel sleepy, nor tired, or bored. I seriously enjoyed it. I listened to the gospel with an open and clear mind and I did actually understood what the priest was talking about. I lip sang the songs coz I dont know them, but I wanted to. I didnt care if I was off tune. I wanted to give praise to God.
 

It is not an obligation to go to church. It is a desire. A desire to give thanks and praise.
 

It is just 1 hour of my week. WHY havent I been going?! I've been holding off my tears throughout the service. If I was able to make Sunday, my non-negotiable gym day, why not a non-negotiable day for God, and only for Him.
 

I have so much to be thankful for.
 

I have so much to ask for forgiveness for.
 

I owe Him so much of my good life and whatever and wherever it is right now.
 

For the offertory part, I was contemplating in the beginning how much to give. But during the mass I thought, what was there to think about? I have never practiced tithing. So I just took whatever was in my wallet and gave whole heartedly . It does felt good to give.
 

I didnt take communion though as I havent gone for confession yet.
 

I walked back to my car, in a state of solemn. I immediately called my friend, because I know he would understand what I was feeling. He is a muslim, not a perfect one but he does have this desire to be close to Allah through prayer.

I told him what I felt, and all the tears have streamed down. He said cry, cry for God. When you go to Him, he will come to you more than you deserved Him.
 

I was just so happy that I went to church. I am not a perfect Christian. But now I really do believe that when a person is ready, he will know why. Why it is so important to give praise and glory to God. I never went to Church because I always felt obliged. But not this time.
 

When you are ready, your heart will receive..
 

All in His Perfect Time.
 

Happy Easter everyone. :)